niece and brother vamping it up for halloween... or something

Yes on 89 van

Yes on 89 van

today's my 7th anniversary with my dear sweet babycakes (but don't get me wrong, we're not boyfriends...) jessie. he's my friend, my brother, my fam, my family, my sweetheart, my alternative-universe lover, my sanity, my crutch, my daily world. he's the best. wouldn't know what to do without him...

Lil' Ciggy says smoking is bad

Lil' Ciggy says smoking is bad

new newsletter is up

sorry i haven't been writing much lately. i've really been so busy with the upcoming election and activities here. i'm in charge of my club's gotv (get out the vote) activities including tabling, walking door to door, phone banking, and all that stuff. and a big part of that has been recruiting volunteers to do it and then doing the activities myself too. so it's just been real busy. i look forward to some rest the day after november 7th. until then, i hope you're keeping busy too and make sure to vote. it's a critical election time again. (and if you need any help or guidance on voting, feel free to email me. i'm happy to offer my thoughts.) just vote!

new column:

"Fighting Depression
(of the vote)"

I suffer from depression.

It comes and goes. Some days are worse than others. But it’s always there. Sometimes it gets worse, much worse, and once it starts heading in that direction it’s literally like a downward spiral. There seems to be no end in sight and all I can feel is the depression causing further depression.

My symptoms manifest themselves pretty simply. I don’t want to do anything… because nothing seems to matter anymore. I can’t get out of bed, because what’s the point? I can’t do my laundry, because I’ll just have to do it again anyway. I can’t clean my house, because it’ll just get dirty again anyway. I can’t eat, because I’ll just get hungry again anyway. What’s the point of it all? And so I sit there, on my couch, or lie there, on my bed, and stare at emptiness.

It’s not rational. It just is. Depression doesn’t make sense in any intellectual way. It just takes over. And the more it takes over the worse it gets. My depression eats away at my psyche to where I can’t seem to get out. And each time I have to cling to my own hope for the future where I know I’ll be better, and I try and remember being fulfilled and strong, and I fight the worst instincts of my own mind.

It’s so strange to be fighting with my mind, but that’s what my struggle with depression is like for me. And it’s a difficult struggle continually.

Lately I’ve been thinking about this in terms of politics and elections.

We Democrats are a rather depressive bunch I would say. We have our ups and downs. Some days are worse than others. And we constantly have to fight to pull ourselves out of our own funk to get past the bad days and work for better days.

After our Democratic Party lost the House and Senate 12 years ago, we were in an awful funk. And for a long while we just couldn’t even believe it. And then when we lost the presidency in 2000, and lost election after election of late, boy howdy we were in a funk. Sometimes it was just hard to even think about keeping up the good fight because it all seemed so pointless. And the more depressed we got, the more depressed the vote got each election.

But then, this last year especially we’ve seen a resurgence in the Party, thanks in no small part to our own Leader Nancy Pelosi who has reenergized the Party and who is bringing us so close to the strong possibility of retaking control of the House and Senate this November 7th on election day. Whatever number of seats we may win, the fact is we are excited again.

But then, we’re still a depressive bunch. We seem to shrug our shoulders a lot and ponder what is going wrong on our own California state level. And we wonder sometimes, what’s the point? We seem depressed just to be depressed. And the more depressed we are, the more depressed the vote will be here in California this November. We can't just sit on our hands and stare into space and think hopeless and aimless thoughts. This doesn't get us anywhere.

We know that we can win elections. We know that we can succeed locally, statewide, and nationally. We know that we have positive and energetic and exciting possibilities in front of us and within us. We just have to fight this depressive funk each and every time it confounds our minds and keep on keepin’ on.

There is a beautiful new day each day, and there are hope and possibilities and love to be found within it. I try to remember that myself whenever I’m in one of my depressive episodes. And we as Democrats need to remember that a new day is constantly upon us each day. We have the power to fight our own depressive moments, so that we can shore up that Democratic vote we know is here in our city, our state, and our nation.

Now let’s get out there and get to work! We have an election to win on November 7th.

a few new thoughts from Ariana, that great Woman of the World, during her adventures in Ecuadar with the Peace Corps:

"Coming soon to a city near you. . . .the Mexican pop group phenomenon Rebelde!

"This holiday season, Pierre and Ariana will be traveling all over the country as part of our Rebelde 2006 tour. Pierre has agreed to play all the male parts, and I will be portraying all the female parts. But if anyone wants to perform with us, we will be holding tryouts for the parts of Mia, Roberta, Lupita, Giovanni, Miguel, and Diego.

"As part of my Peace Corps duty in Ecuador, I have studied the music videos of Rebelde and learned a dance number inspired by the song "Soy Rebelde". I will be teaching Pierre the dance too, and we will dance for whoever requests it. Rebelde (Ariana and Pierre) will be performing in the following cities:

New York City: December 16-17
Albany: December 18-20
Las Vegas: December 21-23
San Diego: December 24-27
Detroit: December 28-30
New Year´s Eve: Either NYC or Boston, depending on where people are going to be.

"And then I return to Ecuador on January 2nd. I know that is a very hectic travel schedule for an 18 day trip, but such is the life of a Peace Corps rock star and her favorite groupie =)

"Through our interpretive dance, I hope to teach a litle about what I am doing in the Peace Corps, life in Ecuador, some Spanish, and Latino culture in general. So all your questions will be answered in only 5 minutes =)

"I know it is a little early to try to start making holiday plans, but I want to see as many people as I can when I´m home. So please let me know what your plans are during the holidays so we can figure out how we can get together. I am attaching a photo of my last Rebelde dance troupe, to give you a preview and make you more excited about seeing the real thing for yourself =)

"I´ve been better about updating my blog with photos and stories, check it out if you have time: http://rhiannabanana.blogspot.com/

"Can´t wait to see you all soon! And let me know if there are any specific Ecuador souvenirs you would like me to bring back for you =)

Love,
Ariana"

Rally with donuts

Rally with donuts

Rally with donuts

Rally with donuts

Rally with donuts

Rally with donuts

Rally with donuts

Rally with donuts

great article from Rolling Stone: The Worst Congress Ever; How our national legislature has become a stable of thieves and perverts -- in five easy steps. this article really tells it like it is, without sugar-coating it. very good read

TOP 10
CRITICAL REASONS WHY EVERY DEMOCRAT
MUST SUPPORT ANGELIDES FOR GOVERNOR

10- Angelides is the true environmentalist with environmental endorsements; Schwarzenegger plays politics with the environment gutting the landmark AB32 by an executive order just like Bush and his signing statements

9- Angelides respects minimum wage workers and the increase they deserve; Schwarzenegger only plays politics with them

8- Angelides supports a smart, strong and fair immigration policy; Schwarzenegger flips flops and flips again

7- Angelides supports equal marriage rights for all Californians; Schwarzenegger vetoed them

6- Angelides supports affordable universal health care; Schwarzenegger opposes it 5- Angelides can be trusted to fully fund education; Schwarzenegger broke his promise on education and to our children

4- Angelides stands up to big oil and supports Prop 87;Schwarzenegger opposes Prop 87 and is in the pocket of big oil having taken more contributions from oil companies than any politician in America except George W. Bush

3- Angelides fights for a woman’s right to choose and opposes Prop 85; Schwarzenegger opposes choice, doesn’t oppose 85 and fully embraced the voter-rejected Prop 73 of last year

2- Angelides opposes Bush’s war in Iraq; Schwarzenegger supports it

1- Angelides supports Nancy Pelosi to become Speaker of the House; Schwarzenegger is working against Pelosi’s speakership and supports the status quo, Republican Party stranglehold in Washington, DC

thankfully my friend Martin is ok after the whole earthquake in hawaii. here's an excerpt of his reporting from the ground:

You actually knew more than we did, cuz the lights were out here until 11 45 pm. They are back on now. [M]y neighbor was able to go out and get meat at half off cuz the local Safeway opened up to get rid of their perishables. First time I've eaten meat in chunks since 2004.... We kept abreast of the goings on by listening to a local radio station who received reports from a United passenger stuck on the runway in Denver on a Honolulu-bound flight. He reported everything CNN was saying about us, and talked about the KITV (local TV) feed to the mainland. It was funny.

Things are okay. No significant damage. Some of the drywall that serves as ceiling has shaken loose. Gratefully, my landlord was out on the mainland cuz I wouldn't want to have someone worrying over every little detail of my apartment when there wasn't any where else to go. Was already awake at the time of the earthquake and jolted out of bed when the walls started dancing. Went to the bathroom and bolted the apartment when the ceiling and the walls moved in opposite directions. (You'd think someone from so. Calif who lived through the first Northridge quake and who worked the evacuation of the Los Angeles County Medical Center in San Fernando would be used to this. After all I got my first employment as a tri-lingual [interpreter] at LA County Med Center cuz I volunteered after the earthquake there in 1978.) Fossil and D Wayne suvrived well. They thought the bed moved cuz I was snoring.

i'm looking through some old posts of mine and run across the fact that last week was my fourth anniversary with my cat Amaya. yay! some have called her names and ridiculed her, but i love her no matter what. she's just wonderful. she may not be your typical lovey-dovey cat, but she's loving and sweet in her own way and i love her. i'm so happy i've had her these last four years.

Tabling in the castro for the election

Tabling in the castro for the election

James tabling for alice in the castro

James tabling for alice in the castro

today's national coming out day. it's not just about me and other gay people 'coming out' and telling our stories. it's also about everyone 'coming out' and talking about the issue with their friends and family and coworkers and everyone. it's about our friends and families and everyone sharing their stories of learning about and loving someone gay. it's not an easy thing to do, and while it's wrapped up in a seemingly simple declaration around the date of october 11th, there's a real underlying force there. once you're able to 'come out' in whatever capacity you are, everything changes for the better in the long run. but it can be one of the hardest decisions ever made. for gay people and for their loved ones and for the community at large.

all that said, i'd like to tell a short story about my first national coming out day. back in 1990, i had come out in march of that year at age 19. by october 11th of that year, i had already formed the umkc gay and lesbian student alliance on my campus and we had become a new popular group among the lgbt students and faculty. we had some difficulties of course, mostly through our own young voices becoming comfortable with coming out and sharing our stories on a campus that was new to hearing them and a city that was new to the issue.

our group decided to make a big splash around the national coming out day by creating what we called 'coming out week' and we created a series of events that week (which i think culminated around the 11th being on a friday, but i could be wrong). we had a panel discussion, we had movie nights, we even had a band play on campus with our logo behind them. i started calling the whole week 'cow'-- i.e. 'coming out week' and for weeks prior to the week i had plastered my own handmade copies of these flyers all over campus with a stick-figured drawing of a guy saying 'cow is coming'. some members of my group thought it was the stupidest thing ever. maybe it was. but it cracked me up everytime i hung one up. 'cow is coming!' still cracks me up.

but i digress. by the friday of that week, we had a 'wear jeans if you're gay day' on campus. which was really successful. all these students around campus were talking about wearing jeans and what it meant, because everyone wears jeans. we even heard about some guys who were so scared that they didn't wear jeans that day just to show that they weren't gay. the dialogue was there nonetheless.

on that friday, there were some chalk writings on various sidewalks on campus that said 'gays go away' and other such things that were meant as a threat against us for speaking out and being so vocal. to me, it meant that we had opened the dialogue and we were speaking truth to power. some of my friends started to get worried for our safety. the campus faculty started worrying about us too. i initially laughed it all off and went into the faculty office where there was an employee named 'Gaye' and joked with her that she was being told to leave. but then later that day, as i was walking to my car off campus, i started to get nervous and felt the power of threats. nothing ever happened to me physically, but my home answering machine at my parents house did receive some rather nasty phone messages.

anyway, that was my first cow- coming out week- and ever since then i harken back to that time and think of how things have changed for me, for my campus, for my family, for my community, and the national dialogue on our issues. change really can happen through just being vocal about yourself and your beliefs. it's important to be that voice. so today, on national coming out day, think about being the voice for change in your own way and talk to someone about the issues, yourself and your loved ones, and your own beliefs. it can change the world.

two new things for my mom to see next time she visits the bay area:

new museum on the streetcars (not the cable cars, but the other cool old san francisco streetcars)
and
farallon islands (way far out there and not sure how one would get there, but there's whale watching and such...)

new alice newsletter is up

My dear friend Cedric, and former coworker at Americans United for Separation of Church and State in DC has a beautiful quote out today on this: Article of Faith: Religious leaders praise statement calling for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender inclusion in the church

I rejoice over the strength of the marvelous statement by the Bishops and Elders Council. The clear commitment to advance the central message of welcome found in the Gospel is encouraging to all who seek authenticity in their faith. Release of this inclusive message will undoubtedly inspire the growth of additional worship spaces that “nurture spiritual lives in communities that celebrate and welcome all of God’s creation.”
It is my hope that all oppressed and marginalized persons will encounter the love, welcome and acceptance in communities of faith so beautifully articulated by the Bishops and Elders Council’s statement and be free of the hostility and rejection too often experienced by gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender persons in the name of Christianity.
-- Rev. Cedric A. Harmon