Moving thoughts from my daily calendar, "Moving Forward, Keeping Still: The Gateway to Eastern Wisdom":

"Keep your hands open, and all the sands of the desert can pass through them. Close them, and all you can feel is a bit of grit."

I read that and can't help but think how important my attempts at staying open to ideas, friendships, relationships, communities over the years has allowed me to feel the world around me, rather than closing myself off to my own preconceived notions or my own sense of right. It's hard to be open and optimistic and positive throughout life, but it's something I strive to do, every day. And I think it has larger benefits for my soul, my happiness, and the world as a whole.

Right in the middle of traffic, the carcass exploded -- splattering its innards across the street.

What's playing out in America right now is the bait-and-switch strategy known on the right as "starve the beast." The ultimate goal is to slash government programs that help the poor and the middle class, and use the savings to cut taxes for the rich. But the public would never vote for that. So the right has used deceptive salesmanship to undermine tax enforcement and push through upper-income tax cuts. Now that deficits have emerged, the right insists that they are the result of runaway spending, which must be curbed.

My niece is coming for a visit in early March. Yay! And guess what movie comes out just before then? And it's starring my favorite young actress, Lindsay Lohan. My niece and I are gonna have so much fun!

Jessie, not one to be interested in politics for more than a few minutes at a time, made one of the most politically astute analogies I've heard in a while. Yesterday when we were talking about Howard Dean's falling behind campaign, he said it's exactly like the Dotcom invasion: all hype, everybody's excited, lots of money, but then comes the Dotbomb when its shown there's no substance beneath the hype. I'm paraphrasing his words, but it was still quite astute and I'm still thinking about it today.

And let me say a few words about the Democratic primaries going on and my thoughts, as I've been quiet for the most part. Regardless of what happens in the next month or two, I have always been part of the larger campaign of "ABB: Anyone who can Beat Bush." And I'm still with that campaign. Last year I took so long in choosing sides because I liked many of the Democrats and because my major interest was finding someone who could beat bush. As I said recently after the Iowa Caucuses, I've always liked Kerry and his policies, even to the extent of voting for him in the MoveOn.Org campaign last year. But I readily admit I grew very frustrated with his say-nothing, wimpy campaign. And Dean was saying what I and many others wanted to hear. He was invigorating the Dems, and that was awesome. I still like Dean a lot. And I think his recent troubles with the "Iowa Yell" were way-overblown by the media. But I also worry that his recent stumbles have hurt his electability and hurt my larger campaign of ABB. Additionally, I feel like Kerry and Edwards and Clark have started really getting their acts together, saying stronger words about why bush is so bad, and having quality campaigns now. And any of those three, and Dean, fit my ABB interests.

Let me also say, I am not one to be interested in following a popular trend just because it's there. On a separate note, and as an example, I can't stand line-dancing because I hate the idea of being forced to do the same thing as everyone else. I don't want to say that I would be changing my mind just because other states have gone another way. But my larger campaign is still here: ABB. Right now, today, I'm still planning on voting for Dean on March 2nd in California. But I'm wavering back and forth with Kerry and maybe even the other major players right now, because I want to win the November election, I want someone who's electable, I want someone who WILL beat bush, and I want to work together with all my fellow Democrats. So for those who read this and care and will be voting in the upcoming Democratic primaries in your states, I say the same thing I said to my mother yesterday (who has to make up her mind by this Tuesday): vote for whichever one you like the best, the four major candidates at this point (Dean, Kerry, Clark, and Edwards) are all better than bush and have policies that work for me in the larger perspective. So do what you think is best for you and your country. And I'll do the same. And we can all look forward to the larger goal of the year, once this is quickly settled soon, of spending the year working against the bush campaign and beating him in November.

Enjoy your right and ability to make one of the most important decisions for our public and nation and world.

This site takes a little time, but it puts a lot of this in perspective and has the right idea. Determine which Democratic presidential candidate fits your views on issues best, without knowing who's who until the end of the game. Clever. Vote by Issue.org.

this is how pathetic things are getting between me and my cat: she's adopted my computer chair as her own napping ground; i am now kneeling in front of my computer and typing away; she won't budge unless i coax her away with a treat in the kitchen; and then she gets annoyed that i've taken her chair; when i step away, even for just a moment, she jumps up and claims it once again. pathetic.

why does technology hate me?

examples from the war between technology and me:

1) i buy DSL and my computer runs SLOWER than before
2) my computer makes that terrible gurgling noise now
3) supposedly i need more RAM or a new computer or something, but why? why me?
4) i have two broken laptops sitting near my door waiting to be taken to the dump
5) one of those laptops only broke down because 'i touched it'
6) i have two PDA's that i could never get to work
7) these two PDA's are now gathering dust on my floor
8) my cellphone is constantly on the blink, with a battery that only lasts a few calls
9) email is sent to me or by me, but never arrives to its destination
10) my combo fax/printer/copier/scanner is in reality only a printer that can barely do that

again, why does technology hate me? is it something i did? i know it likes my money and wants more of it, but is there a way to wave the white flag, surrender, and/or apologize to it?
technology: what can i do to make things right between us? i can't live without you and i want to make this relationship work. i really do. i lo-lo-lo-love you.
ok, i'll admit, that didn't sound sincere, and maybe technology hates me because i don't appreciate and love it enough. tis true. but i want to love technology. and yet it hates me so.

any ideas on how to make a healthy union between me and technology? chocolates perhaps?

every sunday morning i like to relax and chill with alice on the radio. but today, today, there's an inane golden globes promo commercial playing every five minutes. it's driving me nuts! not allowing me to 'chill' at all. i think i'll have to not listen anymore this morning.

There's never a perfect time to move forward the cause of civil rights... Neither is there ever a wrong time.-- Assemblyman Mark Leno, D-SF.
P.S. Starting next week I'm doing part-time consulting for him on the side. Cool, huh?

It is a historic moment to use the State of the Union to attack the civil rights aspirations of a group of Americans. It is unconscionable and outrageous.

We are appalled by [Bush]'s direct attack on the fundamental principle of American democracy, an independent judiciary. Contrary to the [Bush]'s statement, our courts were not created to enforce the will of the people, but to enforce and interpret the law. Mr. Bush ought to understand this, given that he sits in the White House because of court action, not the will of the people.

this is my family, series has its own page now. with more to come....

CHOICE

Today is the 31st Annivesary of Roe v. Wade. Let's celebrate and recommit to our right to privacy. Save CHOICE-- Save Roe v. Wade

This is my family, series
This is my friend, jessie

Came up to my apartment, his new neighbor, and befriended me
Laughed when I thought he was straight
Started eating out with me daily because I couldn't cook
Forgot how to cook for himself too, just because we enjoy dining together
Talks to me just about everyday
Goes to the grocery store with me, walks to work with me, finds time for lunch and dinner with me, without it ever really seeming like it's too much
It's just normal everyday behavior
Lets me touch him
Touches me back
Hugs me often
Makes me laugh all the time
Likes my laugh
Makes friendly fun of me
Can put up a mean fight with me, but never leaves the friendship
Has called me his 'best friend'
His having so many friends, that means a lot
Wants to take trips with me
Understands my fear of flying, my OCD, my depressive states, and other such erratic behaviors
Feels comfortable expressing his own erratic behaviors with me too
Listens to me even when I'm rambling and have no point
Calls me for lunch and dinner, even when he has his boyfriend to dine with
We make a great threesome
Thinks of our friendship as something with a future, even if he moves to NYC
Is Bart to my Lisa Simpson
We're an odd pair that fits beautifully
Reminds me of a brother or old friend from childhood that I've never lost connection with
Set up my website and my computer and my technical gizmos
Puts up with my complete inabilities to manage technical gizmos
Helps me figure them out and more
Began my start in movie acting
Still plans on filming me
Takes lots of pictures of me
Talks with me about cute boys
Mocks my behaviors
Jokes with me about himself
Isn't afraid of being himself with me
Introduces me to his mother and family and friends
Is my lover-in-spirit
Loves me as I do him
This is my friend, jessie.

My sentiments exactly: This is the first place I've ever lived where I've felt conservative - and nobody, nobody would ever call me conservative.

Hey, Reese!
It's great to hear from you. I really think it's wonderful that you have set up a forum for all of us to keep in touch. I confess I've been guilty of not keeping in touch myself. Are you still in San Francisco? I would love to hear what you've been up to. For myself, I am doing well, in spite of a health setback. I was diagnosed last July with breast cancer. Total shocker, to say the least. No family history. Anyway, I had surgery (a lumpectomy) in August, went through chemo from August to December, and now am in the middle of radiation treatment. You should see me! I lost my hair, but it's growing back and now I've got a buzz cut. I look like the true butch that I am! Seriously, I love the short hair and plan to keep it, maybe dye it a fun color.

Anyway, I continue to work at my health care research job, and have taken a deferral for med school. I plan to go to med school at George Washington University in Washington D.C. next fall (2004). So, I'm beating the cancer, and am learning so much from this experience. I certainly cherish each moment, my dear friends, and life, more than ever.

Maybe you can edit this and post on the website? I don't mind that the class knows about the breast cancer, but I also want to emphasize that I'm battling through this and looking forward to the future...

Reese, I miss you, and hope you and your family are well!

Love,
Stephanie
March 15, 2003

I learned today that my friend Stephanie died last month from her fight with breast cancer, near the end of 2003. She was my age or so, so she was in her early 30's. I've been searching today for a picture of her and I at graduation, but I can't find it. I know I have this perfect picture in my files, but it's missing for some reason right now. I found some others though. I might post them sometime.

The above email was the last I heard from her. As often is the case, friendships grow distant over the years and especially due to physical distances. She was in Philadephia at the time of this email. But we hadn't seen each other in years. We met and bonded our graduate school year in New Jersey, 1994-1995. She was probably the closest friend I had among my colleagues at school. We even traveled together during Spring Break to Tucson, Arizona where her parents were and my friend was. After graduation we both moved to Washington, DC and hung out often at first. Then, as usual, things changed, time moved on, she moved to California, and by the time I moved to California too, she had moved back East. My last communication with her was the above email from her, and my response asking for the appropriate edits. I doubt she'd mind any edits now. So here it is. And there it was. I'm not sure what to make of it all. But I know that she was good people. And I wonder where the time went.

P.S. I finally found the picture:

let me say a few things about iowa:

i like john kerry
last year i was a closet supporter of his for most of the year, although i truly struggled among several including dean
i left kerry's campaign because his campaign was crap, he wasn't saying anything, he had nothing going for him, he was bland, and most importantly he didn't seem to know how to fight against bush
dean was saying everything that needed to be said and that i wanted to hear and more
i like dean
i still like dean
i also like many of the dems in the race
i'll support lieberman over bush, and i hate lieberman
i'm still planning on voting for dean, today
but, i've always liked kerry better on policy than dean
and we'll see what happens over the next few weeks
no matter what, i want a dem who WILL beat bush this november
and that dem better have a strong message and not be afraid to fight
no more wimping around from the dems
maybe the other democrats have learned a thing or two from dean's strong, 'take-no-prisoners' fighting stances
and that's good for the party and our ultimate fight against bush and the republicans throughout the country
thoughts for now, more to come....

and back to reasons why we need the democrat to win and get rid of bush: Bush to Address Same-Sex Marriage in his State of the Union speech. Ugh.

so let me get this straight: bush does a photo-op with martin luther king, jr.'s headstone and wife, then goes back to washington dc and, sidestepping the many blocks by the senate democrats of a racist guy from becoming a federal judge, appoints said racist guy to a federal judgeship anyway. talk about bush flipping the finger behind his back, while pretending to show care about mlk and his legacy for the cameras

today i keep having this intense internal feeling that something big is about to happen, something great and wonderful. i have several things in the back of my mind of what could be on its way, and i've been anxious for some things to unfold, but today feels stoically transcendent. regardless, i keep feeling very excited about 2004-- as i call it "the fantastic '04." i'll keep you posted.

i have not been feeling well lately. it's not a cold or a flu or those things, at least i think not. i'm not sure, but i've been having headaches and stomach aches and sinus aches and just aches for the last week. the stomach thing has been the most puzzling cuz it feels unique. and i haven't been sleeping comfortably or well this last week either. i don't know why this is or what this is but i wish i would feel 100% once again.

yesterday, as chris quietly and sweetly sat at my computer for about 4 hours cleaning it of worms, resetting programs, and other things that i don't understand, and i sat there wishing i knew how to help or basically wishing i knew how to do things myself and/or wishing i knew how to properly thank him, i was reminded of the times when i was younger and my father would work on my car while i stood next to him wishing the same things and offering to hand him a tool or get him some water or something. it all makes me feel totally helpless and useless and i wish i was smarter and knew everything and could be completely independent, and yet am happy that i have friends and family who care enough to be there for me. i hate feeling stupid and useless, and yet i always get that way with cars or computers or technology or you name it. in 1994 when i left kansas city, i happily abandoned cars for urban living and haven't looked back. is it possible to abandon technology too? i think not, and i don't want to, but i wish i was smarter about it. a really big thank you to chris and jessie, but especially chris this time for so many hours of boring assistance to little ol' me, for helping me with things that i guess i should know how to do myself, but can't and don't. and a big thanks to my father and grandfather for all those years of helping me do all those car things i couldn't grasp either. i hope i can help people with other things someday. i'm just not sure how or what yet. but i want to assist in my own way, somehow.

today, amaya, my fiercely independent and often skittish cat, for the very first time, after a year and three months of living together, quietly laid on my lap and slept, while i watched tv on the couch
it was so warm and loving and suprising and comforting
i think she's starting to like me

This is my family, series
This is my mother

Orchestrates everything
Creates long two-week driving trips around the country, every year or more
Plans out every road, every park, every museum, every motel, every stop
Takes picture after picture after picture of the family and the vacation and the holiday and more
Collects Christmas lists and birthday lists for everyone
Buys everything on everyone's list, even if there's not enough money for it
Budgets everything somehow perfectly
Creates her own home-shopping-network for the rest of the family to buy for others
Used to have long lists of paper for this
Now puts a computer and a laptop to work for the same effect
Keeps everyone in the family updated on everyone else, because no one can talk to the others like they can talk to her
Pays attention to all the little details
Ties the family together everyday, with her knowledge and her care and her love
Sews the patchwork of our family together, everyday, without which, we'd all fall separately apart and lose touch
Holds and hugs and kisses and warms and touches and loves
Remembers when I visit that I love Juicy Juice and cereal and Puffs Plus tissues
Fixes my room just the way I like it
Prepares all of those things for me in advance of my trip home, without my having to say a thing
Cooks and cooks and cooks requested meals everyday
Decorates all over, wraps all the presents, stuffs the stockings, plans the events, gets everyone else excited
Smiles and laughs and enjoys her family during the holiday
Always takes our calls, even if more than once a day, and for no reason, and even if the cell phone keeps breaking connection
Understands we talk best when we're in the mood and have time
Always in the mood to talk to us
Understands that we may not want to chat right away
Wakes up at 2am because suddenly the kids are in the mood to talk right then
Listens and helps and advises and strengthens
Paints in her sparetime
Somehow manages to have sparetime
Talking to every family member everyday, running the church choir, running the church, managing vacations, orchestrating birthdays and holidays and presents and lives, shopping, cooking, managing, handling, comforting, making, sewing, fixing, planning, whew!, all of which is work, work, work, without pay or often acknowledgement
Does it all from the heart
Wants everyone to be happy and strong
Never is afraid to say "I love you"
Always puts the family first
Wishes and worries and hopes and dreams and takes great care
Loves her family
This is my mother

This is my family, series
This is my grandfather

Deems his family priority number one
Cares about every little thing more then he lets on
Wants everything in its place
Redecorates the Christmas tree after the women have finished, just to get it perfect
Stuffs secret presents into the stockings
Sings secret songs hidden on recorders for the family to find one day
Whistles and sings and hums and muses
Sings old-time songs that evoke characters in your head
Taught everyone how to fish
Took the grandkids off on weeklong fishing trips to the Ozarks because he loved it and loved them
Cleaned the caught fish for everyone
Understood when his eldest male grandchild didn't want to learn how to clean a fish
Laughed when he said, "Eww! I don't want to learn how. That's what Grandpa's are for."
Didn't judge him for being who he was
Fixes cars and appliances and leaks and toilets and gutters and yards and more
Whistles all the while
Surprised his grandson with his love and understanding after he came out as Gay
Still hugs him today, years later, nothing's changed
OK's his wife to go on separate vacations to visit the grandchildren, even when she doesn't think he will let her go
Misses her terribly while she's gone
Wants the exact driving directions of his daughter's road trips so he can follow along while she's away
Enjoys hearing about all the travels and trips of the family
Happy to stay in his recliner the rest of the day
Snoozes off and on through his favorite old westerns, old movies, old tv movies, and Matlock episodes
Awakens happy to see his home and family still around
Worries and stresses so much about his family that his heart hurts
Hides his own internal pain
Doesn't want anyone knowing he has weaknesses too
Listens to his wife and daughter even while pretending not to
Advises and guides his family's members with love and respect
Dreams of winning the lottery and building adjoining houses for every member of the family
Loves his family
This is my grandfather

Proving that capitalism is alive and well, a logo company has created t-shirts, hats, mugs, and even a teddy-bear with a logo that was stated in an advertisement created by a right-wing group describing Howard Dean and other 'liberals' as "... latte-drinking, sushi-eating, Volvo-driving, New York Times-reading, body-piercing, Hollywood-loving, left-wing freak...". Cracks me up! I only wish they didn't link to the right-wing group's website, and I wonder whether the right-wing group is getting some of the take from selling the merchandise. Otherwise, I'd love to have one. But NOT if it's gonna support that crazy group. I wonder.

By reneging on his promise to the people who are suffering and dying from HIV/AIDS, the president's level of funding amounts to sheer hypocrisy...

"Scientific McCarthyism" has been defeated, for now, but as Andrea Lafferty, executive director of the Traditional Values Coalition, and the woman that Jessie called up in Washington, DC to harangue her for calling him a sheep, undoubtedly says, "The issue is not going to go away." We'll see, for now, real scientific research reigns.

Some may call this "playing politics." Others call it by its real name: evil.
The reality behind anthrax vaccines for our military. Reminds me of the smallpox scare of recent days as well. All it is is part of war propaganda, fear-mongering, and electoral politics. What it does is kill people and drain needed resources from public health departments that need to be working on real health crises. I worked in the public health care field for two years during the Bush Administration and pre&post 9/11 times, and Bush was using health fears for politics and profits.

Another day, another big Republican lie.

a string of lies begins to unfurl, but is the public really paying attention? do they even seem to care? well, i do. this november, let's tell bush that we do. i agree with this guy, bring it on.

You can't have a war, cut taxes, have the economy in a garbage pail and spend billions going into space.... How are they going to pay for all this? I don't see how it's morally justifiable.
Where does going to Mars fit into our priorities????

my cat snores. is that normal? or is this just another example of how strange my cat is?

Bush planned the Iraq war right upon taking office, well before 9/11, well before the 'war on terrorism'? Bush had a plan for preemptive military strikes, something that was not campaigned upon, well before the the 9/11 horrors? Shocking! Not. Hello, people, where have you been? Wake up, America, to the lies and the rhetoric and the spinzone. Did I mention lies?

forgive the subject matter, but.... my neighbor's dog has the biggest testicles imaginable. why on earth have they not been lopped off? have they not heard of neutering?

Why do people keep stealing my name?

jobs, jobs, jobs, and more jobs. last year, no jobs. this year, more jobs than i can reasonably take on are coming my way. i even got an offer for a job back home in kansas city, and i was never even looking there. 2004 is gonna be fantastic. everything in my life seems to be coming together in some extremely wonderful and amazing ways. more to tell soon.

my new laptop isn't working anymore. and the only thing anyone can figure that's wrong with it is that i touched it. i have that impact on technological gizmos. i'm going back to candlelight and fancy penmanship.

We won this case today, but it will be back, and many more like it. As I mentioned before back in May, this is the beginning of the end for civil rights and anti-discrimination cases, or at least the new tactic the right-wing is and will be using to fight for the right to discriminate and segregate. Because once the idea of religious discrimination supercedes civil rights (i.e. your diversity is against my religion or my religious self-expression, or my religion doesn't allow me to hire you, sell you a home, offer you a loan, because your group is not holy) then there's no stopping that from winning everytime. Unless we do something to stop this. Now.
Look, I'm quoting myself now. :-)

I share the governor's optimism and enthusiasm, but I'm troubled by his hypocrisy and revisionist history... He talks about the aftershocks of overspending, but he created half of this deficit.-- Assemblyman Mark Leno, D-San Francisco

There is no quiet space in our lives anymore....
An avalanche had shut part of Highway 89, so no one was going anywhere. It was heaven.

States claim they cannot afford the millions of dollars it costs to hold presidential primaries. How ironic that at the same time, the federal government is spending billions of dollars to build democracy in Iraq. The idea that Americans cannot afford democracy is profoundly disturbing. What are our values if we consent to be less free just so we can save a few bucks?

and the attack from the right-wing begins:
Howard Dean should take his tax-hiking, government-expanding, latte-drinking, sushi-eating, Volvo-driving, New York Times-reading.... Hollywood-loving, left-wing freak show back to Vermont, where it belongs.
what's wrong with sushi and lattes? although i would never have them together....

and then there's this great quote from Dr. Dean himself:
If there's a candidate in the Democratic Party who can bring together the two candidates for president the last time that fought like crazy, maybe we're not the weakest candidate; maybe we're the strongest candidate, and the only one that can unite all the Democrats around the country

this is how non-technological, technophobic, and un-hip I am. i've given up trying to make any of my pda's or computer calendars or computer address books or whatnot work. i've given up. today, i stopped by the store and bought me an old-fashioned 'engagement calendar' for 2004 with pictures of quilts. how appropriately non-tech.

Amaya is so cute..... right now, she's defending the house from pigeons. Or at least, keeping a stern eye on them out the window.

You know me, I don't watch television. Except for the Simpsons (which was hilarious tonight! "this is rudy guliani, believe me"), I watch very little of tv. But I must admit I've really gotten into the new show Arrested Development. It's shockingly good, every time. I watch it and I roar with laughter. What else is there to say? If you haven't seen it, you really should. Beyond that, I'm getting into the whole Fox Sunday night line-up, a good laugh-out-loud night of fun. And that's not easy for someone who lost faith in television years ago to say.

Passive statements about non-passivity. It is abundantly clear that consumers are not being passive anymore. They've seen that the food industry will provide food that will make them fat and make them sick and ruin their health.

Freaky. The jet fell into the water between Egypt and Saudi Arabia over a deep underwater crevice thick with sharks..... blood clouded the water because sharks were eating the bodies.

i realized yesterday

this summer will mark my 5th year in san francisco. around the turn of the new year in 1999 i was dreaming of a move to san francisco, but couldn't seem to make it real. i was scared and hopeful and worried and frustrated and wondered, as i sat stagnantly in washington, dc. i wouldn't end up making the 'crazy' final decision to just pack it up and move, without a job or friends or ties or money, until the spring. 5 years later it's easy to see it was the right decision, something of course i knew immediately upon arrival that summer. but in early 1999 i was still struggling and stressed and worried. sometimes, i think, we struggle the most with the decisions we know are right.

i've also been realizing, ever since i was jobless in 2003, that i don't want to live anywhere else. i'm where i want to be. and that's a powerful realization. and the first time i've ever had that thought. there's still much i desire in life, but being where i want to live, and knowing that in my heart and soul, is a great foundation for the rest of LIFE.

so much for Bush and the republicans constant call throughout the years for 'state's rights'. when it comes to states doing things that conservatives don't like, suddenly the federal government is more important to them. it was all a control issue anyway. it was never real. just hypocrisy.

The latest agency to take up the president's faith-based call is the National Park Service..... the Park Service also approved a creationist text, "Grand Canyon: A Different View" for sale in park bookstores and museums. The book's editor, Tom Vail, writes: "For years, as a Colorado River guide I told people how the Grand Canyon was formed over the evolutionary time scale of millions of years. Then I met the Lord...."
I hate it when 'religious' people say crap like that, because it assumes that one can't be religious and believe in evolution or other scientific prinicples. So annoying. The Bush Administration really takes over every aspect of life these days. Are we gonna have 'proper' and 'only conservative christian' prayer services at the parks soon? We must defeat him this fall.

I always forget that Pat Robertson has his own direct phone line from God. Apparently he's the most important person in the whole entire world.
Maybe Pat got a message from Karl Rove and thought it was from God.-- my former boss, the Reverend Barry Lynn of Americans United for Separation of Church and State.

And, when you go out with a guy who farts a lot, you realize it's not pretty all of the time. Nothing's ever ideal.

I love Sheryl Crow. Her voice and music are just perfect. And the fact that she's also from Missouri makes me feel all the more close to her. I got her Greatest Hits for Christmas; it's awesome. I have all of her albums so having her hits is rather superfluous, except for a few necessary extras and the fact that it's all a great compilation. I'm content listening to her all day.

it's the first day of 2004 and i'm in new 'techritory.' i have dsl, i just spent the afternoon at a coffee shop on my new laptop (thanks to martin), and i'm sending messages to people's cell phones. i may be doing things that others have done for a long time, but for me, it's new and crazy and i'm scaring myself. it's gonna be a wild fantastic '04.

Kansas City Chiefs Wide Receiver Johnnie Morton was called a 'faggot' recently by his former Detroit Lions team executive. Controversy, fake apologies, news, slander, whatnot. Well, I just have this to say, Johnnie, you can be Gay for me anyday.