well, the june 'pride month' edition of the newsletter i put together is about to come out. i'm really proud of my first interview. i've never done an interview before, and frankly i'm not sure the group has done one in its newsletter before either, but it occurred to me that it might be a fun way to make the newsletter more interesting than just having people write up their own things. plus, i really did have questions i wanted to ask the person i interviewed-- the new chair of the san francisco democratic party who is a member of our group-- so an interview seemed the way to go. we had such a good time talking and discussing that we went on way too long and i've now had to parse the interview into three segments over the next three editions of the newsletter. but in a way, that's fun too. see the link above for the full newsletter, with the interview, and then below is my own editorial from it:

"Mom and Ample Pride"

So I made my Mother a deal.

You see, I went home to Kansas City for the weekend of Mother’s Day. Well, my Mother really wanted me to come with her to our family church, a place I haven’t attended since high school. As much as I love my Mother and my family, going to church is not high on my list of things to do. It’s a nice enough church and was definitely important in molding me throughout my young years, from birth to adulthood. It’s a United Methodist congregation with a poor, white, Democratic-leaning background, but currently run by a right-wing Republican minister who often interjects her politics into her sermons, to the consternation of many of the people in attendance.

So, like I said, I made my Mother a deal. I would go to church with her for Mother’s Day, if she would go with me to our first ever meeting of the local chapter of PFLAG while I visited town. Well, she took me up on the offer, and wouldn’t you know PFLAG-KC was having a Mother’s Day potluck just a few hours after church let out!

So in a topsy-turvy day that began with listening to a right-wing Republican minister rail against the ‘attacks on marriage,’ ‘attacks on the family,’ pro-choice people, and by quoting James Dobson of the Focus on the Family, my Mother and I then found our way across town to a potluck meeting of the PFLAG-KC where the group discussed the wonders of my having seen same-sex weddings in San Francisco City Hall, the excitement over Massachusetts’s judicial decision, attending the recent pro-choice march in DC, and dealing with an openly GLBT family member for the first time for some of the new attendees who were learning and struggling. My Mother really enjoyed the meeting, as she is very social amongst a friendly group of people, and found ways to showcase her Pride for her son, to my own embarrassment and shyness, as Mothers are wont to do from time to time.

But the most incredible part of the day was the drive, as my Mother and I opened up more than before on these issues and my life. We talk all the time, but oftentimes not on issues of my Gay life or the intricacies therein. And to speak openly with her about how she and my Father are feeling much better on the subject these days, how she has even told her right-wing Republican minister about me, how she prays and hopes for the best for my life and our equality, and how I hope and pray for her happiness within her church and in life, was a great opportunity seldom had.

Going home for Mother’s Day reminded me of how far we have come and how far we still have to go, and the realities of the right-wing and of being openly Gay in the Midwest once again. But knowing that my Mother is behind me all the way, and behind us in our struggles for equality, makes me feel Proud on a whole different level. And that’s something I value deeply. Happy Pride Month everyone.

The Post actually does a detailed job of looking at the lies and negativity in "a typical week in the life of the Bush reelection machine." Beyond all the helpful analysis of these lies and saturation of the lies throughout the machine and the Republican surrogates throughout the country, came this nugget:

Scott Reed, who ran Robert J. Dole's presidential campaign that year, said the Bush campaign has little choice but to deliver a constant stream of such negative charges. With low poll numbers and a volatile situation in Iraq, Bush has more hope of tarnishing Kerry's image than promoting his own. "The Bush campaign is faced with the hard, true fact that they have to keep their boot on his neck and define him on their terms," Reed said. That might risk alienating some moderate voters or depressing turnout, "but they don't have a choice," he said.

Ah, so sad, it's true, the Bush campaign has nothing left these days except to push more and more negative attacks against Kerry. They have nothing to promote or showcase any longer. All their plans for positive images and messages (Iraq, 'mission accomplished,' sept. 11/terrorism, education and Medicare reforms, the economy/tax cuts, etc.) have blown up in their face over the last year and they have nothing, nothing, nothing positive to promote any longer. They only can go negative. And that means, they're losing and they know it. They still have the ability, in the next 5 months to change everything, and we never know what might happen in those 5 months, but it's getting harder and harder for them to win as each day goes by. And they know it too.

I liked this editorial so much, I'm posting the whole thing below, with a few bolded highlights of my own:

IT IS a sad commentary on the state of the Bush administration's credibility that the timing of its announcement of a serious terrorism threat has come into question.

The White House has only itself to blame for its predicament. The false information it disseminated about Iraq's weapons of mass destruction -- as a major pretext for war -- gives cause for Americans to be skeptical of pronouncements from an administration that often likes to implore paternalistically, "Trust us."

No one doubts that al Qaeda remains a threat and could attempt to strike at high-profile events such as the political conventions this summer. The war in Afghanistan clearly weakened, but did not extinguish, al Qaeda's capabilities. But by all indications, the information rolled out this week by U.S. Attorney General John Ashcroft in a semi-alarmist manner was not new. The administration revealed that intelligence reports were showing increasing "chatter" that suggests an attack on U.S. soil may be coming in the next few months.

Curiously, Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge has not elevated the color-coded terror alert level to orange. Ridge and FBI Director Robert Mueller were notably more restrained than Ashcroft in describing the threat.

So skeptics among us are left to wonder: Was this news conference prompted by a qualitative change in the terror-threat assessment or was it a political move to change the subject from the distressing news out of Iraq and the sour aftertaste of the Sept. 11 hearings? The fact that many Americans -- even the heads of national police and firefighter organizations -- even think to ask that question is indicative of what this administration has lost. Asked about the timing, Ashcroft said, "We believe the public, like all of us, needs a reminder."

He's right about the need for a reminder of the threat of al Qaeda.

But if the administration is right about the danger of a devastating follow-up attack this summer -- and we should all prepare as if it is -- then there is another grim reminder in the administration's announcement.

Even as this country braces for another terrorist attack, we are reminded of how much national treasure, international goodwill -- and sacrifice of our troops -- continue to be exhausted on a war in Iraq that had nothing to do with fighting an al Qaeda enemy that struck our homeland, and may do so again.

Leslie, that great Woman of the World, sends us another report from her Kenya Peace Corps assignment. She actually sent this a month ago and I had forgotten about it in my email until today. So, now, without much further delay, here it is:

"Long time no email!!!! In case any of you are wondering what happened to me, not much.... I am still in Kenya serving as a Peace Corps volunteer! I am sorry I have not written in a while but life has taken on that air of a routine. I no longer feel that it is exotic. Though each day is still exciting in its own way, it just doesn't seem like there is always news to give to the rest of the world. I think I have just reached the part in living overseas when you no longer view your life abroad as separate from the life of all the other people you know living in the states. I guess it is called settling down. However, I realized the other day watching CNN that I do live abroad and in a different mentality than the states. People over here (Kenyans, ex-pats and travelers) really have a jaded opinion of the states. We are not so high on the list of friends and acquaintances theses days. Most people are wondering what happened to our statesmanship and diplomacy not to mention our foreign policy. It makes me sad to see our credibility diminish. I just hope that things turn around before it is to late. Ok i didn't mean to turn this into a political email but as usual I had to add my two cents. So back to me and my life in Kenya.

"I am still working in the south coast on various projects concerning natural resource management, conservation, capacity building and overall development. Next week we are setting up crab farms on Wasini Island to help the women's group I work with there expand their incomes. Following a training seminar on how to care for the crabs and the importance of conserving the forests and the reef, we will set up the pens and fattening cages so that the women can begin to farm the crabs. The crab farms help to alleviate pressure on the reef by reducing the demand for crabs that are caught on the reef and by supplementing household incomes reducing reliance on fishing. I am also nearly finished with the cookbook I have been composing to help market the womens group. It has been so much fun cooking with the women on Wasini and learning how to make their spicy Swahili dishes.

"In addition to working on Wasini, I have been doing research on HIV/Aids in an effort to help PACT expand its initiatives in the area of HIV/AIDS. I also have been working to update news articles for our gender news letter and have been working to help with our elephant sanctuary project in an effort to expand their honey programs. I guess you could say I have been working a lot. I now understand why Peace Corps requires a two year commitment. It really does take the first year to get use to life in another country and truly understand where and how you can work. The second year is all about the work!!!

"It has almost been two years!! It has really flown by!! I will be finishing up in September and then plan to head back to the states via Egypt to cheek out the pyramids and American University's Arabic program. I would like to start graduate school in January. I plan to continue my studies in International Politics, who knows where my two cents will take me :) I think I will focus on the Middle East and Conflict Resolution (I have been doing a bit of work with PACT and their Sudan Program focusing on CR and I really am intrigued by it). I may also through a bit of African studies in there to add variety. I am really looking forward to returning to the academic world and to the states.

"On the social front, my family came to visit and we had a great time seeing the animals and just hanging out on the coast of Kenya. It was great to see them and to have them see my life here in Kenya. I ventured to South Africa with my sister to get a feel for that part of the continent. South Africa is amazing!! It is like the west but with the feeling of Africa. I really enjoyed seeing the country and have a bit more faith in the continents ability to develop a decent infrastructure. If one country can do it surly others can follow. Kenya is trying but it has taken a year for them to do a small section of the Nairobi-Mombasa Highway (the main Highway for goods to get into the country), maybe in 5 years one will be able to drive up country with out having to maneuver around giant pot holes!!

"Ok thats quite long enough!

Take care,
Leslie"

And the best news is, she's coming back home soon! I can't wait to see her again. :-)

my fever broke last night! it was major sweat city all-night, but i feel a lot better today. still not 100%, but so much better. and still sweaty.

beyond all the bad movies i rented and constant sleeping and freezing and high fevers and horrible headaches, here's an example of just how lame and boring my life was this week: i played simpsons' monopoly with my cat and she won. she owned everything in town and i kept being sent to jail....

i'm so tired of being sick and in my house....

but since i'm stuck in my house, anyone want to play simpsons monopoly with me?

Wow, check it out: The New York Times is actually apologizing, in its own way, for the last two year's lack of proper research and questioning of the Bush Administration and military conservatives who wanted to go to war on Iraq:

...we have found a number of instances of coverage that was not as rigorous as it should have been. In some cases, information that was controversial then, and seems questionable now, was insufficiently qualified or allowed to stand unchallenged. Looking back, we wish we had been more aggressive in re-examining the claims as new evidence emerged — or failed to emerge.

The truth is really starting to come out in so many ways. Bush is so gone.

so i feel terrible, and yet i feel oh-so-much better at the same time....

you see, the problems i was having last week with depression have definitely subsided now. it's hard to explain, but i can really tell my meds are working now. it's not that i feel the meds themselves, but i feel so much different myself. my mind is motivated; my interests are high; i want to get out and do things; i'm excited about life. it's really hard to explain, but when they work they work, and i'm all the better.

the problem is that i feel terrible physically this week. somehow i've had a running fever for the last couple of days. don't ask me about a temp reading cuz i don't have a thermometer. but i know i have a pretty high fever because i feel awful, my head is throbbing (and not in a normal headache way), my body is hot (take that one however you like), and i'm freezing. freezing! last night my fever broke briefly and i was sweating like crazy, but mostly i've been freezing the last few days. it sucks. and i feel so rundown.

but thanks for my mother and grandmother i had frozen homemade vegetable soup from my grandma's house from my trip back home a few weeks ago. and so i thawed it out today and it made me feel so much better. (props to grandma!)

so i'm just sitting around my house, bored out of my mind, watching bad movies, and sleeping, sleeping, sleeping. my mind is excited and wants to go outside and play but my body won't let me. will i ever be completely whole?

i've been in southern california the last several days visiting my niece. much to tell about that, and her recent visit up here, and my recent visit back home to kansas city, but in the meantime, here's a few classic quotes from the recent family visits:

(at the elementary schoolyard, repeatedly and proudly) this is my uncle reese. he's the gay one...
and
(my niece to me) this is my best friend melissa and she has a gay uncle too and we want you two to get together so we can be cousins.... (melissa to my niece) my gay uncle already has a boyfriend (my niece to melissa) oh, well he hasn't met my uncle reese yet. we got to get them together.

(to her 4th grade teacher) this is my uncle reese. can he stay at my desk with me today? you'll like him, he's gay.

(playing the game of "Life" and upon having children with my recently married husband, from my niece and quite emphatically) you ADOPTED the children. boys can't have children.

(sung repeatedly and loudly throughout our recent visits, by both my niece and i, from the 'confessions of a teenage drama queen' movie) that girl was a one time, teenage, drama queen.... da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da..... that girl was me!

(stated repeatedly in a whiny and annoying voice to me prior to a movie) can i have an icee? i really want an icee. please can i have an icee.....

(scary story told by me to my niece before going to bed) once upon a time there was a red blob and a green blob. and the green blob said to the red blob, "can i have an icee? please let me have an icee. i really want an icee." and the green blob never stopped asking.... scary....

(to my mother and grandmother) i can't believe you made everything i requested. can't you take a joke? i'm so full.
and (to my mother upon visiting back home, saying this to my own surprise) please don't make me eat anymore. it hurts, i really does. (my mother at our first ever pflag-kc meeting and pointing to me proudly) he witnessed the marriages in san francisco city hall! tell them about it...

and then, completely unrelated to family visits, but a great quote from last night's simpsons:
mr. burns: i can't be held responsible for what my hired goons are ordered to do!
such a classic pointed reference to current events, but oh-so-subtly done

i do have pictures and stories from my recent visits, just haven't gotten them up here yet. i will.

San Francisco's awesome U.S. Representative and the next Speaker of the House if Democrats win back the House this fall, House Democratic Leader Nancy Pelosi, is no longer pulling punches:

Bush is an incompetent leader. In fact, he's not a leader... He's a person who has no judgment, no experience and no knowledge of the subjects that he has to decide upon.

He has on his shoulders the deaths of many more troops, because he would not heed the advice of his own State Department of what to expect after May 1 when he ... declared that major combat is over... The shallowness that he has brought to the office has not changed since he got there.

Not to get personal about it, but the president's capacity to lead has never been there. In order to lead, you have to have judgment. In order to have judgment, you have to have knowledge and experience. He has none...

This president has demonstrated very clearly that he does not have the capacity to present a plan to transition... The only way we can get more troops from other countries is to have a president who respects the other countries. It's hopeless for George Bush. He has made it hopeless.

Gotta love her!
And then she offered this:
"The risk in many of us speaking out in the way that I'm speaking out to you right now is that people will say, 'Oh, it's just political,' '' Pelosi said. Yet in the end, Pelosi said, she is confident that the failures in Iraq, as well as discontent over domestic issues, will defeat Bush in November.

"He's gone,'' Pelosi said of Bush. "He's so gone.''
Yeah!

i'm ok i'm ok i'm ok i'm ok

no worries.

it's still up and down

i was feeling better sunday and some of yesterday, but then last night and earlier today were not good at all.

last night i had a meeting (a volunteer meeting that i wanted to go to in general) and i nearly didn't go because i was freaking out so much. all i kept wanting to do was run home and curl up on my couch and hide away from the world. it was pretty sad, especially since i generally want to be involved in that meeting (it's my local bay area steering committee of gays for kerry and i've been doing a lot for that group lately). i almost turned around constantly on my way there. once there, i couldn't seem to talk much and i kept hyperventilating and just wanting to leave. i spent about 10 minutes in the bathroom at one point just because my heart was racing, i was breathing heavy, and i was afraid to be out amongst the group. i made it through the meeting, but left without an after-wards meeting i was supposed to do. and i happily went home after that.

today wasn't much better as i slept most of the day in bed or on the couch not wanting to go anywhere. i did have a work meeting today and managed that, but barely, and couldn't get anything done at my office after that. only tonight am i starting to feel better.

so what's going on? i do not know and wish i could figure it out. i did call my doctor today and will be seeing him tomorrow to talk about it and meds and such. last night made me think that i was having some kind of anxiety/panic attack or something. today i just couldn't do anything. and i'm really not sure why this is happening all of the sudden now. but i'm trying to be as openly honest about it as i can on here, even if i end up worrying people, because i want to be more open in my life, and i want to share, and i want mental illnesses to be viewed more understandingly in general and that can't happen unless we survivors open up about it more. thanks for listening.

a helpful article, with important points at the end of it, on the subject of talking with kids about the horrorific pictures and topics of the war

"I used to be prejudiced," he said. "I had no idea who gays were, and everybody else was hating them, so I did, too."
But now he views gays as he does others. "To each his own," he said. "I have nothing against them. They're good people, you know."
"I was raised Catholic," he noted. "Who are they to say? The only thing I'm against is them having kids. It seems wrong." He paused, and added, "But eventually, I'll probably get over that, too."

i just unpacked!

how exciting, and lame, is that

my depression is really hard to understand, as i mentioned before. it's just not logical at all. again, it's not about sadness. it's about some kind of distinterest.

for instance, i'll think that i should unpack, i know i need to unpack, i see the bag in the middle of my floor still packed, and in my head, i'll just think "what difference does it make? i'll just have to pack again and then unpack again and over and over again and so what's the point of it?" or another example, i'll know that i need to eat something but then i'll think "what's the point? i'll just have to eat again later and it doesn't solve anything. why eat?" another example, i'll know i have to go to work today and then i'll sit there on my couch and stare at the walls and think "what's the point? there is no point. everything is useless and stupid and nothing matters."

and on and on. and it becomes completely disfunctional in the sense that i cannot get anything done and just lay there, or sit there, or don't get out of bed, or distract myself with online surfing, or distract myself in other ways because i don't want to think about the reality anymore and i don't want to do anything because doing anything seems pointless.

and so i sit. and i can't move. and i can't do anything that needs to be done. and i just feel like stopping the world somehow.

it doesn't make sense. i don't think it's supposed to. that's why it's an illness. and i struggle with it sometimes. and other times, when my meds are working properly, i don't struggle so much. this week was an example of my meds not working for some reason, or a heightened state of depression for some reason or other, or something. i'm not sure. and it doesn't make sense. it just is.

below is an abridged email i sent to jessie yesterday with more of these thoughts:

sorry i was acting weird last night
i've been feeling really odd all week
kinda like i did two summers ago when i couldn't get myself to go to work in berkeley and kept calling in sick and not eating and not leaving my house
then i was depressed and not on prozac and suicidal
now i'm just depressed, on prozac, and not suicidal (i promise!)
and i've been trying to figure out why i'm depressed this week
and the online stuff has just been a distraction to keep me from doing my work and from letting myself think about what i want to do
i think i'm scared of things working out and being happy and so i've been being destructive to myself this week by not doing anything constructive or useful or necessary (i haven't been doing any work, i haven't gone anywhere i needed to go, i didn't meet you guys for dinner, i haven't even unpacked still, and i've just wasted time online as a distraction and time waster)
and the more i would try to get myself in gear and do the things i need and want to do, the more i would feel overwhelmed and unfocused and just cycle back into doing nothing but being online
i would even say to myself that i knew i didn't want to be doing this and that i wanted to do other things and i would get tired and want to lay down but i still couldn't focus on anything
i upped my prozac slightly now and i'm trying to shake myself out of this slump
but it's been my week
i'm supposed to go to a party tonight (believe it or not) or else i'd say lets hang tonight
i just needed to get this all out so here it is in email form....
thanks for listening and being a great friend
i think i'm scared of either failing miserably, or more likely as things in my life are really coming together, succeeding wonderfully. and so i'm trying my best to make myself fail, for reasons that are obviously deeply and intrusively psychological
that's the scoop


and so that's what my week, with a higher than normal depressive episode, has been like. it's not pretty and it doesn't make any sense. it just is. i thought i'd write about it and share.

Well, Missourians, wake up and smell the political reality for this November: SJR 29 passed the General Assembly today. It is a homophobic and destructive piece of legislation which puts an amendment to the state constitution on the ballot, at the same time as the presidential election (how convenient), to mandate marriages be only between a man and a woman. Get ready for a very public cultural war in my Show Me State. It's no longer time for silence.

Depression is a difficult thing to understand. I wish I understood it more myself. It's not so much a feeling of sadness, for me at least. It's a fundamental inability to function properly. I don't understand that either.

It's kinda been a rough week this week. And I don't understand that myself either.

so it's official, my vet thinks my cat was feral too: the way she hides her food and attacks and stresses and ate so much at first....
it's ok and she's wonderful, but it explains a lot.

well said:

Iraq and the War on Terror initially had nothing to do with each other, regardless of how badly Bush and Wolfowitz and Cheney wanted it so. But the administration did their darnest to link the two, and in reality, the two are now indistinguishable.

So as Iraq goes to s***, so does Bush's terrorism ratings. And at the end of the day, his performance on the WOT is all he's got left going for him. He wanted Iraq and WOT linked, and now he's got it.

Worst president ever. Without a doubt.


November can't come soon enough....

i'm back in san francisco and there's so much to say and do and write.... and so much is going on in the world and the nation! and i still need to unpack... i'm just overwhelmed, but i had a great time back home in missouri

You and I can argue the wisdom of going into Iraq some other time. What is not arguable, I think, is that the invasion and occupation were marked every step of the way by incompetence, smugness and repeated mistakes.

I thought the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, would change things, that movies and audiences would turn serious and that people would come together in a common understanding that life is worth living and things are worth doing. But I was way off. If anything, American movies are more cynical and despairing than before. Their implicit message: People are garbage and the world is terrifying.
If that is an accurate reflection of the American soul, well, that is terrifying. Until now, American cinema has always expressed faith either in the sanctity and splendor of the individual or in the rightness of American institutions. Today both faiths are absent. The result is that we're getting precisely the kinds of movies that George Orwell might have imagined, not for 1984, but for 1980 or so: Movies for scared, uncertain people who are about two seconds (or one terrorist disaster) away from welcoming Big Brother.

i'm in kansas city with my folks! much to report shortly.

Acting militarily, we have created more terrorism than we have eliminated.

here's something to make us happy:

"A Kerry Landslide? Why the next election won't be close."
and i agree with most of what he's saying....

HOW THE F&$#(*%^@#()#$*#&#$(%()*@&$!!!! WAS THIS STUFF ALLOWED?!?!?!? WHAT THE F(#*&%()@_(*%(&#_(* WERE THEY THINKING?!?!!!!! THIS IS F()&(*#&()%&*(^@)(*$)(&@!)( DISGUSTING AND GROTESQUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and this is our military. i believe the commander in chief is bush, but maybe he's not to blame because the memo didn't get to him or he didn't have an action plan before him before his daily campaign stop

Someday a case study in public relations will ask how we lost, step by step, photo by photo, the sympathy of the world after Sept. 11.

ok, this is for my techie/mac readers (you know who you are) who live and die by the mac:

any thoughts on Steve Jobs advising Kerry?

conversation earlier this morning between me and elmy who owns the mexican restaurant across town that i've been meaning to visit for months:

me: "elmy! my friends and i are finally coming out your restaurant's way tomorrow night and we're gonna stop in. will you be at the restaurant tomorrow night?"
elmy: "oh, yeah, definitely...."
me: "hooray! i look forward to seeing you there. should be fun."
elmy: "well, it's gonna be a pretty busy night."
me: "oh really, why, are you having a private party or something?"
elmy: "no, it's cinco de mayo..."
me: "ay carumba!"

here's the full newsletter

well, the may newsletter i put together is about to come out and here's a preview regarding my intro piece:

"Gettin' Real"

The election for president is 6 months away (6 months!). I/You/We all want Bush out of this office that he never won and illegitimately legally stole from us in 2000. And the race is gonna be tight! I am completely optimistic we are gonna win, but there's some real work we gotta do to make it happen. And there's some real stuff we need to deal with, get beyond, and then move forward. We have to deal with the reality that Senator Kerry is not perfect. There, said it. He's not perfect. Are you perfect? Am I perfect? Was Clinton perfect? Is Senator Boxer perfect? No, no, no, and no. No one is, especially national politicians. As much as we want them to say and do everything exactly right from the get-go and to never waiver, well, bi-golly, they often do and often mess-up and often choose rhetoric we abhor and often make us mad.

And people, we gotta get real and understand that and move beyond it. Because as much as I/you/we want Senator Kerry to be perfect and to say everything perfectly and to be completely perfect on the marriage issue and the military issue and the Iraq issue and the whatever issue, he's simply not going to be perfect. He is what he is. And Bush is what he is. And we know how not even close to reality Bush is and how disastrous he is for our community and for the nation and for the entire world. So we gotta get real and recognize Senator Kerry isn't perfect and recognize that in the next 6 months he may say or do things that we might not be 100% happy with and after he's elected president (yes, I'm more than ready for that) he may say or do things that we might not be 100% happy with then too. It's not as if he's our Assemblyman Mark Leno (who is pretty much perfect, ain't he?)!

Senator Kerry has the extremely hard job of trying to woo middle-of-the-road, Middle America, mildly political Americans throughout the country in those 'swing states' every one is talking about. He is with us fundamentally, you and I both know that; and Bush is against us fundamentally, you and I both know that too. But he's got to win over those others. And as much as we sit around and fight over every single syllable and enunciation Senator Kerry gives over marriage or any other GLBT issue, the reality is that these swing voters don't really even care about these issues. So while we're in-fighting and in-bashing, Bush and the Repubs are not wasting time like we are and are out there motivating and influencing these voters with their rhetoric. And Middle America is wondering which candidate will win the "war on terror" or fix the economy or whatever. This is not to belittle our issues or concerns by a longshot, but to recognize reality, recognize we're dealing with a national campaign, that this campaign is incredibly close, that the campaign will be won and lost in these swing states, and that we can't let Bush happen for another 4 years.

So, let's get real. Senator Kerry has been with us from the beginning and is with us now. We have much to be proud of and happy with in regards to him. Why waste our time squabbling over a piece when the pie itself is so amazing on the whole. Just check out these two links: 1) Pride at the Polls; 2) Kerry's website. Could you have even imagined a presidential candidate even 2 years ago being this supportive of our community and our equal rights?! No, absolutely not. Most were for the Defense of Marriage Act; Kerry voted against it and spoke out against it! Most were for the ban in the military; Kerry voted against it and spoke out against it! Kerry was one of the original sponsors for our civil rights back in the 1980's! And, now, we're wasting time, letting the Repubs use this wedge issue amongst us as well as the rest of the country, and we're bashing Kerry for not being 100% perfect. Well, get real and focus people. Because we have a job to do and it's not just about getting Bush out of office. It's about reminding our friends and family and community about how far we've come and how much Senator Kerry has done for us over the years and how much he will do for us (himself or via appointments and legislation and the judiciary and the Supreme Court and the world) throughout his presidential career and beyond. I for one could not be more thrilled with who we have before us as our Democratic nominee for president and the opportunity we have to move our agenda forward nationally in whole new beautiful ways.

So let's get to work. There's a new GLBT committee forming here in the Bay Area to work on ways to help Kerry win California, raise money, and help swing those swing states, and everything else involved. Email me for details if you're interested in more on that (reese@reesesworld.com). There's also a local chapter for Senator Kerry's campaign which can be reached via http://www.kerrynorcal.com/ and they need our help. Imagine how many locals we can remind of the positives of Senator Kerry for our community. And imagine how many tourists we can help convert at Fisherman's Wharf!

There's much to do. But remember, in order to do it, we gotta get real.

Reese Aaron Isbell, M.P.P. (Editor)